To preface, I'd like to state that I'm venting and just need to be a whiny, salty bitch for a bit. The way I've written this may seem like a much more massive deal than it truly is. Daddy just needs to yell into the void.

My ggparents should have moved to Canada during WW2 instead of the United States. They done fucked over all their descendants.

I legitimately despise our government. I'm fully aware Canada has its own set of issues as well, but it would still be a far better option than being stuck here.

The United States really needs to have some form of standardized psychological testing for officials who want to enter a government position, to determine whether or not they're absolutely psychotic. They also need an age cap. Nobody over 60 should be serving in office.

I can't afford to live in most parts of the country in which I was born, yet I can't afford to leave this country either.

My saving grace for now is that I'm moving to a much cheaper area. I only pray it stays that way.

I know the future will be bright one day, but for now, things must go to shit before they get better. Humanity learns best through harsh lessons. Unfortunately, those lessons don't stick, as people seem to keep conveniently forgetting history.

Today while I was on break I went to go stop at Checker's to get lunch because it's close by and fairly affordable.

The lady in front of me was trying to pay for herself and her kids, but her card declined due to it being expired.

I offered to pay for her, but she stated that she'd be fine, and could call her husband. I still insisted and paid for her and her kids, especially since it was busy and I didn't want the line to be held up, rendering the staff more stressed.

The thing is...that was my last $50...I'm broke. Her and her family were clearly more well off than I was, and it would've been better if I'd let her husband walk in and pay for them.

Why the hell did I do that? I was charitable to someone who didn't need the charity. Why do I feel the need to martyr myself for everyone?

I didn't give her a kindness, I only screwed myself.

Now I'm extra broke and hungry.

I'm such an irresponsable dumbass.

In any case...uh...

Anyone want to commission a moron?

Try doing something now, you freaking libtards

I was initially excited for the colder months, despite being afflicted with seasonal depression, due to how rancid summer was.

Now, I wish for the heat and wet to return. My skin is cracking like a crème brûlée and my nose is consistently gushing blood. These afflictions are making it difficult to get anything done.

Once I get off of work, I am going to take repose in a sweltering bath. I'm going to get as moist as possible. I will snort Vaseline and coat myself in so much lotion that it will become my new epidermis.

DO NOT REPLY UNLESS YOU ARE EITHER INTERESTED IN COMMISSIONS OR HAVE LEGITIMATE QUESTIONS REGARDING COMMISSIONS

These are single subject, fullbody, full coloured character illustrations.

$1 per illustration.

I take payments via Venmo.

PM if interested.

Examples can be found below.

I will make nothing pornographic.

If you ask for porn, you will be blocked.

I do not care how long I go without food. I will not eat. I haven't worked hard enough to deserve food, and making commissions is not hard work. It's not real work at all. I'm just lazy.

Viewer be warned, this is some pretty heinous schazbah we're about to witness. This shits more real than Hellman's Mayonnaise and more rancid than expired Hellman's Mayonnaise.

Cow :)

Easy Pete, an easy vote.

Paid for by the Easy Pete for President Foundation

For this reason, I will be growing out my body hair, moving back to Oregon, and joining a Sasquatch commune.

I will dearly miss you all, but I need to be myself. I need true happiness.